I Am Afraid They Will Say Yes

Everybody assumes the fear is the no.

Every article about this assumes it. Every friend who has told you to just go for it assumes it. And you have let them assume it, because it is a respectable fear and it is easier to talk about.

But you know, and I think you have known for a while, that if that woman said no on Tuesday you would be fine by Wednesday.

It is the yes.

Because a yes means a date. A yes means being in somebody's house, or their office, or their yard, doing the thing, while they watch, with the whole of it resting on whether you are actually as good as the sentence you said.

You are afraid of the yes and not the no, and naming the right fear has never once made a person less able to move.

And I want to say plainly why this matters and is not just a clever observation.

If the fear is the no, then the cure is encouragement. People tell you you are great, you feel better for an hour, and nothing happens, because the encouragement was aimed at the wrong target.

If the fear is the yes, then the cure is completely different. It is smaller work, and it starts with looking at what a yes would actually involve rather than at what it feels like.

Send by the hand of him whom thou wilt send

There is a sentence at the burning bush that is more honest than most people are comfortable with.

Moses has run out of objections. God has answered every one of them. And then he says this.

And he said, O my Lord, send, I pray thee, by the hand of him whom thou wilt send. (Exodus 4:13, King James Version)

Send by the hand of whoever else you like.

That is not an argument. That is a man who has lost the argument and still does not want to go, saying so out loud to God.

You are inside a text where somebody said the real thing at last instead of the presentable version, and a plain admission has never once been the end of a person being used. Exodus 4:13 says send, I pray thee, by the hand of him whom thou wilt send, and the Holy Spirit is the one who kept that sentence rather than the tidier ones before it.

And look at what happens next in the chapter. There is anger, and then there is Aaron.

He is not dismissed. He is given company. The objection is met with a person rather than with a correction.

You have an objection that God answers with company rather than with a lecture, and being afraid of the actual job has never once disqualified anybody from being sent to do it. The Holy Spirit is the one who supplies what a frightened person is missing, and it is written in Exodus 4 that the answer to the last objection was somebody to go with him.

Look at what a yes actually is

So let us do the thing that actually helps, which is to look straight at the yes instead of around it.

If she says yes, what happens. Concretely. Not the feeling. The sequence.

There is a day. There is a time. There is a drive over. Then the thing gets done, the thing that has been done many times before, in a place it has not been done before, with somebody around who may or may not be watching and probably is not.

And then it is done, and you either did it well or you did some of it well, and then you go home.

You are able to write the whole sequence down in eleven lines, and a fear looked at directly has never once stayed the same size as a fear looked at sideways. The written word has a man say the worst version of his objection out loud, and the Spirit of God is the one who is present while a person finally names the actual thing.

And here is the part that most people find surprising.

The yes is not a test of whether you are good enough in general. It is one job. If it goes badly, one person has a thing that was done adequately instead of beautifully, and the world continues.

You are not being examined on your whole life, and one piece of work has never once been a verdict on a person's competence. The Holy Spirit is the one who keeps a thing to its own size, and Exodus 4:13 has a man sent after saying outright that he would rather it was somebody else.

Ask for the small version

Now the assignment, and there is a piece of mercy built into it.

Ask one person this week, out loud or in a message, if they need it done.

And ask about the small version. Not the whole house. One room. Not the whole set of records. One month of them. Not the full job. The narrow bit, the one nearest the middle of what your hands already know.

That is not cowardice and it is not underselling. A small first job is what anybody sensible does with a new customer, and it is what the customer usually prefers.

You are allowed to ask about the small version first, and a narrow first job has never once been a lesser piece of work than a large one. The Spirit of God is not in a hurry with a frightened person, and the written word answers a man's last objection by giving him somebody alongside him.

And take somebody with you, if that is available. A friend in the car. Your sister at the other end of the phone afterward.

You are able to arrange company for the first one, and needing another person nearby has never once been a sign that somebody should not go. The Holy Spirit is the one who is with a person in the room, and it is written in Exodus 4 that Aaron was the answer to the fear rather than a correction of it.